Um, breach of hospital etiquette

My best friend is very sick. He's had a splattering of his intestines removed.

He called me from the hospital. He has his own pain-killer button, and doesn’t even use it.

We’ve both agreed that drugs aren’t all they’re cracked up to be, I guess. I sent him balloons.

Why?

Apparently they don’t accept lap-dancing go-go dancers in lieu of flowers for men with catheters.

Oops.